One of the worst bits about moving house is having to change everything. After our recent move I had to change Doctors which was no great loss as my last one wasn’t that good. I once went to him with an itchy scalp and asked if it could be stress related – “Stress? Don’t talk to me about stress” was his considered reply.
Anyway I’m now registered with the Doctor that Sarah has been going to for years, a Christian practise no less!! Before I could be accepted I had to go for a check over with the nurse – you know height, weight, wee-wee sample etc.
I found out that my BMI (Body mass index) means I am obese!! This came as a bit of a shock to someone who considered himself to be cuddly maybe, tubby possibly or maybe just over-weight but apparently I have to lose weight just to be over-weight!! It also means I have to go for a blood test as someone somewhere has decreed that if your waist measurement is over a certain size you need to be monitored for diabetes etc.
During the examination I was asked by the nurse if I regularly checked myself “down below” which to me sounds more like a euphemism for masturbation than any serious medical question about testicular cancer. I had a vision of Les Dawson dressed up as Cissie asking me but mouthing the “down below” bit.
13/10/05 @ 17:20